December 5, 2005

The Wake

It occurred to me today that the purpose behind a Wake is not so much for mourning, but more so that you can see, in terms of pure volume, the number of people who will miss the person who has passed away. Well, there was a large volume of people who passed through the funeral home where my Uncle Mike was today, so that should tell you something.

It told me something. Something that I have always known on an instinctual level, but that I've never really pondered in my conscious mind:

Michael Baubkus was a pretty kick-ass guy.

By that, I mean, life dealt him one nasty curve ball, but he never let it get him down. I mean, I never heard him complain about being in a wheelchair, or lament his station in life. But, what I learned today, is that it wasn't just that he never complained around me, it was that he never complained at all. Period. And that is pretty amazing.

I could go on and on about my uncle, but there is one thing in particular that I do want to write about. When I first heard that he had died, I didn't really know what to think, or what I was going to say about. But as the days have passed by, things have started coming to me, bit by bit.

Earlier this year, when my wrists really started hurting, I was pretty upset about it. I felt the tailspin of "oh, I'm never going to be able to work again, I'm not going to be able to live the life that I want to lead, my life is over, and so on". There were a lot of things that got me to stop thinking those dead-end thought, but one of the primary ones was the example of my Uncle Mike. When I thought about my problems with my wrists, I immediately thought of the physical challenges that Mike faced every day. But yet he had a job. And a house. And a loving wife. And two dogs, some fish, and a parakeet. And it wasn't just that he had all of this stuff and was miserable. It is that he was reasonably happy, and he fought with the hand of cards that he was dealt, and he improved his situation in life. And all of these other things came to him through all of that hard work.

So far, I'm only about a quarter done with my life. And I've been thrown some curve balls by life, sure, but nothing truly major (yet). But I know, deep inside, that if my Uncle Mike can handle the volley that life sends his way, then I can too.

-Andy.

Posted by andyr at December 5, 2005 9:46 PM
Comments

Thank you for good words.
I and Mike never meet, never talk - but I'm sure, he was sincere cousin. I found him a year ago and lost yesterday. The thin thread between US and Lithuania was breaken.

Posted by: Stasys at December 11, 2005 11:42 AM